The last days when I revised the manuscript before sending it to the publisher, I suddenly remembered the roads I had traveled. There are so many memories that I want to share, but then I think of a topic that I really like. Why should women travel alone before getting married? The world is so BIG, why don't we go alone to improve ourselves before we get married? This article is for girls who are disoriented in life, and also for girls who are ripe and ready to get married.
DANH MỤC NỘI DUNG CHÍNH
Accept the difference
Once, I was in Cao Bang, in the evening as usual, I would pour wine to invite guests to drink. However, that day, there was only 1 guest stay in the homestay from Malaysia. His name is Kee, he's 1 year younger than me.That day, I also invited him to drink. The first cup, he took a drink. I continued to pour the second cup. So he covered his cup with his hand. He said a sentence that reminded me forever: My religion does not allow drinking
I turned upside down because of this sentence. But I tried to force him to drink so I could have a cup of wine. And I thought again, if a man doesn't know how to drink, it's too bad. But then he taught me a lesson: We have to accept the religious difference in culture, not everyone is the same. Learning to accept the difference is learning to respect the opposite person and also respect yourself.And finally, because I didn't invite him anymore, he liked it, and then he became a friend of mine later.
Lower my ego
One afternoon also in Cao Bang, I met a friend named Michael, he was from France, but not Paris, he was from the South of France. I was almost mesmerized by him, because just seeing him meant I wanted to talk to him immediately. I sat there, talking to him about everything in the world, and you know what, he sat still and listened to my story from start to finish. If he had to add a few sentences, it was a question he thought he did not understand about me.
I like him right from that meeting. But not because he did many impressive things that day, he told me things I didn't know in this world. It's because he listened to my story.And that night, I started to learn his way again. I learned how to lower my ego, not to talk any less about myself but I would listen to the story he told. At this time, I gave the stage light to him to show.The principle of human-to-human behavior is not the same as when you stand up to present a topic that you like, you deliberately impress people about your arguments. Reducing your ego is not a way of lowering yourself.
10 reasons why women should travel alone before getting married (3)
Many people still think that, in a conversation, just say your point is to show that you are an independent, knowledgeable person, but that is completely wrong.
If you want to understand other people, it's not that you speak up in people's faces, but you have to learn to listen to them first and then you can express your own opinion.
Understand what you need and what you need to throw away
Before starting the big trips, I was a very shy person, always afraid to meet men. Even when I met a man whom I thought was perfect, I always asked myself: People are so good, so perfect, why do I have a door? But now the opposite is true, I would ask the opposite: Is his personality suitable for me to share my free time with people?
A person who doesn't know what he needs, he has to throw away is always the wrong choice. Once wrong choose to rebuild again. Going wrong all the time is a waste of time. But people have limited youth. When I turned 30, I felt old. So instead of following this life, running after others, consider yourself, you must understand what you need, throw away something to reduce the unfortunate risks.
There are many reasons why a girl is traveling alone. 1 is because you don't have a friend to go with, 2 is that you want to go alone to explore, experience and challenge by yourself. 3 is because it's your job.
But whatever the reason, traveling alone is accepting loneliness. You have to sit down to eat alone, you go out by yourself, you take your own picture and then you have to drive by yourself on the road. Loneliness is most evident when you hang out in places where there are too many people, but those places are all places where there are families, couples.
Loneliness is also most evident when you drive a car on your own road.Those who travel alone must accept that loneliness in order to have a real experience trip. Because, not always your loved one is next to you, you are not always surrounded by a sweetheart like a cat. Learning to taste the loneliness, to taste the loneliness, to see the value of the chattering days.Not all highly educated people know how to behave.
The higher you study, the broader your knowledge will be and you will know the rules of conduct. This rule is not true for all situations. If only learn but do not know the practice.bI observe a lot of people, the way they behave, the way they talk it doesn't depend on whether they have a high education or not but it is in their human nature: selfishness, self-interest, desire for life, fear of death, take care of your own interests and neglect others.
Not every high school will know how to behave. Because there are a lot of people I meet, studying to master's and doctoral degrees, but to be honest, the way they treat others is extremely frightening. But an ethnic brother living in the mountains makes me much more respectful for the way he behaves.So, we choose to play not by choosing one's degree, but by choosing one's personality.
Later, when we get married, not choosing the husband's money, choosing the husband's family, but first choosing the character of the husband. You will have to live with that character for the rest of your life, then you think you can live, or you just need to live on his money, living on his high education.
Money is not everything
Back when I was traveling, I had a way of caring for other people, that just spending money was enough. I keep thinking, everyone needs my money. Meet someone who just needs to buy gifts, wants to please others to go ahead with money. However it is wrong when I put it into practice.Journeying around Vietnam, I did not have too much money. But in return, I will use my sincerity to treat people. And you know what, the people I meet, still know I don't have much money, but treat me extremely well, and even consider descendants in the house. This is because I always consider the people I meet as part of my family. I don't apply money to show affection anymore, but I care about it with smaller gestures: helping them cook, helping them wash dishes, helping them move their houses, helping them cut rice, helping them do things what they are busy with.
And after these little things, I found out, people love me more, people share with me more, people even turn around, and care about me more.I received these because I really gave them, not because I was smart. These two are completely different!It's not that Asians and Europeans are different. They are the same about this.
One time, I took a friend from Germany to go out. He lives in Germany so he does not know how to drive a motorbike. I practiced letting him go, after 3 minutes he knew how to ride a motorbike and took me on the road as if it was right. After that session, I found that he was very interested in me. He asked me a lot of things, and specifically about publishing my books. Although different in languages, he still told me, when he came to the book, remember to give him a book for him to keep as a souvenir, and although different in language, but he will try to read what I have written.
Another time, I met a French couple. I took them around Cao Bang without taking any money. I did it just because I liked them. So after that, I found out that they are a blogger from France, I went to their website and they wrote about me, introduced my site to the French. And especially they say, they live in Paris, whenever they go to France, they will tell them.Until then, I officially understood that money is not everything. Money is only a tool for trading. New human love is the first priority in the code of conduct. Understand this principle before marriage, we will know, later, not married to have money
I have to say that I learned a lot from the travels, the lessons about the people, the culture, the natural scenery where I went. On that journey across Vietnam, I learned: learning intrusment traditional of Tay people, learning languages, learning how to embroider, learning how to pick tea, learning how to cut rice, learning how to use agricultural tools of people Red Dao, learn how to communicate with people, learn English from foreigners, then learn the nature of what to do must be meticulous, elaborate of the Red Dao.
Have more dreams
I never thought I'd publish a book, and I never thought I'd go around Southeast Asia and then travel around the world. I also never thought I would marry a foreigner. That was me years ago.But now, as my book has gradually matured, one publisher has said they appreciate my book very much, and I am planning in detail to prepare for Southeast Asia by 2021. , and I am also willing to love and marry a foreigner if I feel that my character suits him.
These dreams, it seems too far to a person like me. But now, I have almost reached. That's because I've had a backpacker trip alone. I have made a lot from those travels. My dream also grew, it revolved not only about money and money, but also about what I needed in this life. Trips will definitely make you change a lot, believe me.
Going is a process for us to improve our skills and education, I learned a lot from the people I met on the road. I know what I am missing and need to make up for in order to improve myself.I really respect the culture of a people.
I don't think I will teach my daughter later how to get money from a man, how to behave wisely, how to pamper others. But I think I will teach her about the beauty of a culture, cherish small things, cherish the money it makes, love myself to be loved by others. I also don't think I will teach my daughter to sacrifice for others, but will teach how to keep and let go of things that are not worth it.
Having a husband and then having children, has anyone ever thought of learning how to be a parent before getting married, or thinking about it, just get married and then want to do whatever they want?People say very right, the most intelligent person is not the smartest person but the most traveled person.
The more you go, the more you expand your knowledge. Do not count the number of provinces you have visited, nor count the number of countries you have visited. Most importantly, you know what you have learned from the people you have met. How have you changed from the stories you meet on the road. So the new travel makes sense.There are many other things that I do not share, maybe see you in another post because this article is a bit too much.
Thank you for reading this article!